Being an empath during this election has certainly taken a toll on me, but today I feel like I’ve been hit by a boulder. Yesterday, Sunday, I lacked any and all energy to focus on anything. I forced myself to do some cleaning but that was the limit of my exertion and 90% of the day was spent in bed doing nothing on my phone…because I lacked the attention to read the book I’m working on.
Then last night as I got up to pee the first time of what would be 4 times in the night I had a rude awakening. I had to pee so bad I ran to the bathroom (which is in our room and usually has the door open) only to fully body slam the door so hard I bounced off and onto my butt hitting the back of my head on the humidifier. Jonathan must have shut it when he came to bed. I screamed and cursed but of course, being the heavy sleeper that he is, he didn’t wake. Hard not to be livid after something like that.
Little did I know this was just the beginning of a (not so funny) comedy of errors that resulted in a lost wallet, no money, no lunch, no apple that I hid deep in the crevices of the fridge, and so forth. Some would call this a case of the Mondays. Not so my friend, not so. My Mondays tend to go seamlessly, as every work day does, because I am highly type A and have everything organized and down to a beautiful rhythm.
I tried my usual tactic of saying out loud “today will be great, today will be beautiful” before I got out of bed, but even as I said it my intuition told me I was fooling myself. As I showered I asked myself out loud “why does everything feel so off today?”
Then I get to the office and my trusty friend/boss heard me vent and suggested it was the energy of the nation as we are so close to the election (tomorrow) that I was picking up on. Ding! Ding! Ding! That’s it. Normally I can just let these irritating flaws roll off but today they were getting to me so bad I literally cried (and don’t you dare try to blame it on pregnancy hormones…I know the difference).
I haven’t really let this election bring me down as much as I’ve seen it do to friends and family. I don’t feel depressed or angry or bitter or much of anything toward it because I think both the candidates are super lousy human beings and politicians so either way we’re screwed. Either way the wrong person wins. All we can do at this point is accept it as it is, go about our lives, and take it as it comes. The world seems so much more heartbreaking now than ever before but I believe the state of the world has always been massively heartbreaking, we are just much more aware of it now than ever before because of the speed and accessibility of the news and our friend’s and family’s opinions thanks to the internet, smart phones, Twitter, and Facebook.
Because I know how heartbreaking the world has always been I choose to focus on the beauty and love that I assure you is still prevalent all over.
I digress. This post was just supposed to be a place to vent about how hard it can be as an empath. On the other hand, I feel a lot better now that I’ve written my feelings out, so there’s that.
I suppose what I want other to glean from this post is that sometimes our days just go to hell and we may be scratching our head as to why but there is always a reason if we pause and look outside of ourselves.